What to do when you don't know what to do

Sometimes we can find ourselves "stuck" or "struggling" to figure out where to go and what to do in life. My husband and I are both self-employed, and sometimes we have lots of work - and therefore lots of money - and sometimes, we do not. During those lean times it is very easy to find ourselves in times of struggle and turmoil, wondering where God is and how we're going to make it and what to do to get money and pay the bills and make life easier. 

Finding Peace

After many years of living the rollercoaster life, I started really seeking the answer to what to do, on a spiritual level, when things are bad on the physical, real-life level. I realized that running around like a crazy person trying to "make things happen" was just exhausting and didn't get me anywhere, except feeling like I was losing my mind and ending up on high blood pressure medication.

As I started to really study how to shut my mind down, how to get out of my own way internally, and how to stop stressing like a crazy person, all paths lead me right back to the same spot: learning how to rest in God. Be it  teachings on meditation to quiet the mind, more "spiritualized" western teachings on co-creating with God,  or right back to my trusty bible, all answers were the same. God is there. God is good. God is around us and in us and a part of us, and His awesome power is available to each and every one of us, if only we would open ourselves up to trust in Him and to accept His guidance. 

Isaiah 41:13

For I am the LORD your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.

So what do you do when you don't know what to do? It turns it it's so simple, so easy, that is is almost impossible to believe, but it's so, so true. All we have to do is is give up. Just rest. Just believe. Just tune in to God and co-create what you want to see in your life, and what you want to appear for you. Know and understand that it will all be OK. That right here and right now is exactly where you are supposed to be. Don’t try and force it, don’t try and “make things happen” just -rest. And know that “it,” whatever “it” is, is coming.

• “It” could be a surprise connection
• An unexpected check
• A phone call out of the blue that changes everything.
• It could be as big as a brand new shiny job and as small as a short nap, that gives you a chance to rest and see clearly for the first time in a long time.

He is the God of Miracles. All of his promises are yes and amen. He is lovingly RIGHT HERE, and all we have to do is step into His loving light and rest in the truth and knowledge that He is here for us and wants what’s best for us – always. In all ways.

It is so easy for us to get stressed out and wound up and running around in circles, trying to “figure it all out,” that we forget that we have a Creator who adores us, and made us to be co-creators in this lifetime. We are not alone, we are not abandoned, we are not “stuck,” we simply forget to look up and to be open and receptive to all that creation has in store for us!

Psalm 121:1-3

I lift my eyes up to the hills, where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip – He who watches over you will not slumber.

When we close off who we are, when shut down our minds and our hearts to the Light of Love that God is, then we are transforming ourselves into the negative. We cannot receive the joy and bliss that God has in store for us when we are closed off and wrapped up in our own pain, misery and suffering. We MUST lift our heads, lift our eyes, and know where our power and our glory comes from – and it does not come from inside ourselves, or our own minds or our own brains.

The most successful people open themselves up to God and allow God to work through them. They practice listening for his voice. They stay open and ready to strike when he sends the word and the opportunity their way. The do not strive to always try and “figure it out” and “make things happen,” but instead they stay relaxed and rested in the knowledge that they are co-creators with God, and it will happen in His time, and His time is always the perfect, and right time. 

Proverbs 3:5-6

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”

God seeks to make our path’s straight, when under our own devices, our paths may look more like a pound of cooked spaghetti lying on the floor! Trust in Him. Seek Him. Listen for his Voice, and allow Him to lead you in all things. Then you will know and understand that you are in His will, and your life is exactly as it’s meant to be.

Healing Out Loud

I've been on a spiritual quest since I was a child. I knew I was "different" from the time I was 3. Overly sensitive to words, vibrations, emotions and thoughts/feelings, it felt like I was in some kind of foreign land where I spoke a different language than those around me. I was called to nature, called to the natural beauty of the trees, forests, mountains, streams and every single thing with fur or feathers. I remember being aware of Jesus, even though my family was not "religious." I was fascinated by mythology as a young child. I felt a "connection" something "out there," but of course had no idea what "it" was.

I was born into a family that had a long history of domestication issues, and as I struggled to keep myself walled off from the kind of curated crazy around me, I felt myself building bigger, tougher walls and deeper, wider moats to block out the negative energy and emotional battery that surrounded me at all times. Eventually, I ended up in one bad, dark place after another where I not only learned how to heap abuse on myself, but those around me as well.

I was 26 before I realized that if I didn't take strides to get off the crazy ride that was my life, I would never find the beauty, compassion, kindness, and love that I wanted so desperately. Although I had always, ALWAYS felt "spirit" and "spiritual connection" to something bigger than myself, I never had any guidance to help me find my way. At 14 I discovered the "metaphysical section" at the Milwaukee public library, and that is where my journey began (we didn't have internet in 1981) but it wasn't until I had my first child in 1991 that I began to really, truly understand how broken I was inside.

This blog is about sharing what I went through - and am still going through - as a fellow human traveller on a really chaotic planet just trying to find my way back to the Source, because I know, without a doubt, that there are millions more of you out there, just like me. Maybe by sharing with each other we can gain new understanding and discover new insights to help us find our way a little easier, a littler more quickly, and not so "all alone.

Last year I asked THE UNIVERSE (aka God) to help me on my journey, by bringing new people into my life. Helpers, guides, healers, coaches, leaders, trainers - I asked for it ALL - and boy, has The Universe delivered! Many have not come in forms I expected. Some of the people who have helped me the most over the last year are decades younger than me and look nothing like I would have expected them to look. But they have been incredible, and made a huge, enormous difference in my life. It occurred to me the other day that we often ask for signs/help/guidance and then don't accept it, because it doesn't show up in the form or way we expected.

So here is the first thing I want to share with you, and maybe one of the most important lessons of my life this far - don't ask The Universe for help, and then question the form the help comes in!

I am not alone on this journey. I live with my amazing husband, Randy, our son Jake, and our fur babies Skunk and Mousetrap. You will hear/read me talking about all of them, because they are why I get up everyday and the glue that holds my world together (but in a really good, healthy way)!

I invite you to share in my journey, and to share your own journey through comments and connection. May Peace be with you, may Love surround you and may you find exactly what is is you're looking for! Namaste! 

Freedom from Stagnant Energy

Sometimes in order to center and focus, we have to get out of our routine and open ourselves up to new places, new events and new energies.

Several weeks ago I was really struggling with stagnation, meaning that I was feeling down, depressed, and stuck, even though there was really no reason for me to be feeling those types of energies/emotions. Things that normally work, like meditation, smudging, working with my rocks, and spending time in prayer were no longer doing the trick, and I felt my energy slipping further and faster to the lower vibration of "stuck."  I knew that I had to do something, or I would start to spiral into a pity party of "everything sucks," and that is not a very productive way of being!

The Mojave Desert - Living in the Valley

I am one of those people that finds my center the fastest when I'm out in nature; especially when I'm in the forest. I grew up running the woods in the Ozark mountains, and the energy that comes with the trees, and the sun and moon soaked earth (especially rocks), the rivers and streams, and the animals that live there, are open to me and revive me like no other.  I really grabbed ahold of this energy when I lived in Oregon for 15 years, and would walk out in the old growth Cascades several times a week. The only other place where I can connect with God this powerfully and this quickly is through worship. Making the connection through nature is a little more challenging for me since moving to the middle of the Mojave desert in 2014, because desert energy is not quite the same (although I have learned many lessons here as well).

I'm having some physical issues with my spine right now, so driving is very challenging. I LOVE to drive - I love the concept of "buying a tank of freedom" and hitting the open road, with the tunes blaring and the wind in my hair - it's what freedom feels like to me. Being limited on my driving (and most of the other activities I love to do) has definitely been contributing to my feelings of being stuck and blocked, but I know they are just that - feelings, and not realities.

Traveling up the mountain

In order to get myself charged back up and get re-energized, I asked Randy and Jake to take a trip with me up to Mt. Charleston. Mt. Charleston is a beautiful mountain less than 40 minutes from Las Vegas, where there are trees and rocks and streams and forests and animals - all of my favorite things! I've only been there a few times since moving to Vegas in 2014, and every time I go up there I am reminded of how much I need the type of energy that is only available through forest and mountain  nature.

This trip was no different! Since Randy was driving, I was able to just ride along and really see and feel my surroundings. There is something about living in a valley that can keep us grounded in a stable, but in a more stagnant way.

As we drove up (and up and up) I started to feel my energy shifting. First, it felt like I was getting lighter - both physically and spiritually. I felt my crazy racing mind start to relax, and my breathing naturally got deeper and slower. As we got up around the first trees, I started to feel more alive, and some joy started to build up. As we got about 3/4 of the way up, and were surrounded by cliffs and pines and beautiful granite outcroppings, I literally felt a physical POP at my heart chakra, and was so overcome with joy and gratitude that I started weeping. It was a very, very physical shift in my energy, my thoughts, my feelings and my connection with God. I was starting to feel alive again.

Mt Charleston outside of Las Vegas

We continued up the mountain and spent about an hour up there all together. We were able to park the car and get out and walk a little bit, and as I continued to soak up the energy of the forest, I was allowing myself to transform, to become one with the forest, and the One who created it.

Never forget that God made us to be co-creators, and that God is not only around us, but in us. Find a way to align and re-align yourself and you energy, so that you stay connected to the One that lives in you, the One who created all that exists, and the One who wants nothing but love, joy and bliss for you. It's been several weeks since I was on the mountaintop, and I am still vibrating with that energy, although I can tell that I will need another trip up there again soon.

Remember, we are responsible for how we feel, and how we show up in this world. If you are feeling down, lost, stuck, or blocked, it is your responsibility to do whatever it takes to overcome those feelings. You are NOT A VICTIM! You are loved, and you are love - God is literally living inside of you, is a part of you, and wants your happiness and wellbeing! Now go and find your mountaintop! 

Many different spiritual traditions tell us that in order to heal and recover, it is important that we get the infection of negative energy out of our systems. 

The Bible puts it this way - "So then, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, so that you will be healed."  (James 5:16)  

What are "sins"? Any negative energy or area of darkness inside of us that keeps us from God. What is God? Love. And being One with Love energy is pure bliss. 

In this video, I share how I'm attempting to break free of 26 years of "mood medication," how spending half my life on antidepressants has kept me from reaching my full potential, and how pharmaceutical companies do their very best to try and keep us on drugs, regardless of if we "need" them or not.